be brave, stand out

How cute is this photo?  I love the symbolism of individuality.

I am constantly encouraging my children to be who they are in their hearts, and not who they think the world wants them to be.

Now in my mid-thirties, I've had to learn this lesson numerous times and like all lessons - it's been difficult at times.  Finally though, I don't give a damn about what others think or try following the crowd anymore.  I am me, and no-one else ever will be!  This way of approach has made my life more exciting and amazing by discovering every day more about myself and who I am and giving me a freedom and piece of mind that I never believed existed.

As a kid I always wanted to blend in, children often do.  They follow the crowd and play it safe.  Being a child immigrant was tough.  I stood out like a sore thumb at school, so I quickly made it my mission not to, until eventually I was invisible.

As time went on my little safe haven of invisible bliss turned into an isolated hell.  In my heart I wanted to do things, but they would make me stand out.  Audition for the school play.  Sing in the choir.  Recite my own poems.  I had become so shy that I just couldn't.  I missed a lot of life between the ages of 10 and 16.  Six years of missed opportunity, fun and laughter, and above all - experience.

Life is all about experiences.  When it's all done and dusted what have you got but love and memories?

I made a bucket list a few years ago, forcing myself to face my fears.  It's such a liberating thing to do, I highly recommend it.  I am gradually working my way through it, doing the things I've always wanted to do.  Yes, I'm still shy, but the desire to experience the fullness of life is more important to me these days that I'm willing to feel the fear, and do it anyway.  I don't want to miss a thing!

Surprisingly my confidence is now overtaking my shyness, and I feel more empowered than ever before.  I'm not so worried about falling flat on my face these days.  I know I'll get back up, and the embarrassment may last all of a day. 

"You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do."

- Olin Miller

How about you?  Do you avoid doing things because you worry what others will think?  What do you wish you'd been brave enough to do as a kid?  Or an adult for that matter.  What is written on your heart that is yet to manifest as an amazing experience?

As writers, experiences are our pot of gold, a well of inspiration.  Write from a place of honesty and connection.  Sprinkle the emotion you've felt when experiencing those things into your work.  We all have them, even me sitting there in my unseen cave most lunch breaks.  My experience was observing others, studying what made them tick, building on my imagination and knowing what isolation feels like. Of course I've had a fair ground of experiences since then, full of emotional highs and lows, but all rich with inspiration, wisdom and growth. Good or bad use your life and celebrate all your experiences.  They have got you to where you are now.

Happy writing ;)
Emma